Crap

This is what I wrote for Tuesday:

Last night I had quite a few packets of crisps, left over from the weekend.
Today I’ve had muesli, yog, banana, dates for breakfast, with tea.
Then I can’t remember what I had in the morning, but I must have had something. Some smoothie I think. That’s it really.
Got the runs so I was really hungry by lunchtime, all empty and crap feeling. Got chips and a pitta. Had a glass of j20.

I had chips again for dinner then chocolate and shit.

Today I’ve had normal breakfast, and that’s it. Not feeling well. Rather miserable. That’s it.

Monday

This is day one of me blogging throughout the day and posting at night, and also day one of me trying to ease myself back into normal eating. I am in high pig mode at the moment.
I ate many, many packets of crisps over the weekend, and other shite.

Today I’ve had toast with butter and coo, tea.
Some pink foam shrimps.
A can of full fat red bull
Pasta, tuna, broccoli and light cream cheese. Horrible, really didn’t enjoy it at all, the tuna tasted and smelled metallic. Also cut my finger open on the tin.

1325
Another can of red bull. Erk.  I’m getting addicted to this stuff.

1400
More foamy shrimps

Later:
Chocolate buttons

Dinner: Micro chips, ketchup, four slices of bread, can of lucozade.

Comments

I just managed to approve two comments on the old blog, I was just seeing if I could, and it let me. But they won’t have been imported.

So to reply to you Boko, you asked what’s the matter with my heart on Saturday. Well, it’s broken. By a MAN. Bloody men. Actually it’s not too bad now.

Second, you asked what I was so annoyed and guilty about the other day. I was annoyed because I had too much work to do and was guilty at being annoyed. I seem to have it stuck in my head from some childhood experience that being angry is Bad and Naughty and means you are being difficult and immature and you should pull yourself together. It’s a vicious circle of being angry at being angry.

New home

Here’s the food blog’s new home.  I’m going start doing it properly again. Soonish.

Today

Breakfast was normal, with prunes.
I had a can of red bull, no sugar. I had two cans of Red Bull yesterday. I'm getting addicted. I've decided not to have anymore I think it's ruining my stomach.
I had a raspberry flavoured liquorice stick.
I've had a few sherbet flying saucers.

Lunch was home made chicken soup (with potato and loads of veg in), and two wholemeal rolls buttered with Flora buttery taste.
I think that this week is a write-off, diet wise.

I'm fed up and I can't get righteously annoyed without feeling guilty, even though I have a total right to feeling annoyed today.

Today

Tomato soup with 1.5 rolls for lunch.
Many jam doughnuts.
More sushi then some toast.

Yesterday, today

Yesterday I just ate loads of stuff. Space raiders and things.

Today, I have had normal breakfast of muesli, yoghurt, banana, plus two dates, tea. Didn't enjoy it.
Then I had some sushi just now, not because I was really hungry but because I was stressed. I'm beginning to think the problem is insurmountable, me using food as a stress medication. Don't know what to do.

Saturday

I forgot to blog Saturday. I had toast, two ham sandwiches, crispy duck pancakes, chips and sweet and sour sauce, wine, crisps, crap, crap, crap.
There.

I have junk to eat tonight too, but I’m allowed, my heart is broked.

Dinner

I had some cashew nuts earlier.

Dinner was chicken, parsnip and potato mash, broccoli, gravy.
M&Ms.

Chips

I had small fish and chips and a roll. It wasn't that nice. I wish I hadn't. I am crap.